I’ve mentioned before that I spent a year studying theater in Paris when I was in my twenties. A lot has changed in Europe since the 90s. A lot hasn’t.
Things that have NOT changed in France:
Shops close on Sundays. Many of the restaurants stay open, but these will be closed on Monday. I’ve started to really enjoy the quiet Sundays when no one expects anything to get done.
Service is slow. We have learned that one often needs to signal the waiter to get them to come to the table. We were irritated by this at first but now have found that it means the server isn’t constantly interrupting the flow of conversation. When we return to the states we find it jarring to have the waiter or waitress arrive every two minutes to ask “EVERYTHING OKAY?!”
Church bells ring loud and ring often.
Many people still smoke, but it has changed from cigarettes to vaping and they are not allowed to smoke indoors in public venues, thank God. The government is considering banning smoking on public streets as well, which is very controversial.
The trains are wonderful. They run on time (if the workers aren’t on strike) and the experience is much less stressful and less expensive than flying.
The food is wonderful and the produce is fresher and more flavorful than anything we have at home, especially the grapes, tomatoes, and strawberries. We pay a lot less for quality food in France than we do at home.
The red tape and paperwork is as bewildering and time consuming as ever, which you know if you have been reading our newsletter for any amount of time.
What is different:
The smells.
What used to be the quintessential and therefore most lovely scent of every European city? Diesel fuel. It permeated the streets wherever you went, and now I feel like something is missing. Every so often a truck rolls by and puffs a big cloud of diesel fuel in my face and I am giddy with memories of my youth.
I swear even the cleaning supplies, soaps, and deodorants have become more homogenous around the world. People’s houses used to smell different abroad simply because of their floor polish or dish soap. Not so anymore, at least in France.
No one is lost and asking directions. Since we all have smart phones, I never see paper maps or Lonely Planet Guides anymore (God bless you, Lonely Planet Guides.)
Everyone looks the same. One used to be able to spot Americans a mile away. We were the chubby ones wearing bright white sneakers, baseball caps, and t-shirts with logos. Now everyone is wearing the same brands and styles. The internet allows everyone access to the same influencers and the same shops. Frankly, I find it boring, and I much preferred when I could tell a Swedish family from an Italian one by the color of their pants.
I can use a credit or debit card everywhere. There are still some small villages where the market or small shops might be cash only, but everywhere in Montpellier takes a carte bancaire. Not only is this convenient, but it saves me all the embarrassment of not understanding what the cashier has just said. (French numbers are the worse. Looking at you 99: quatre-vingt dix neuf.) Roberto here: that’s four-score and nine…just pretend you are Abe Lincoln!
The squat toilet has disappeared (and good riddance!) In 1997 these toilets were still pervasive in Paris, even in fine restaurants. I have yet to find one in Montpellier in 2023.
Excitement about the English language. I know this may be about being in Montpellier and not Paris, but the locals are very interested in learning and practicing their English. The easiest way to butter up a shopkeeper or waiter is to tell them that their English is good.
Cocktail culture has arrived. Many bars in our town advertise les cocktails on their menus outside and the bartenders we have talked to have all gotten “official bartender training.” Most of the drinks listed are incredibly sweet, but we blame that on the large student population here.
I have changed. I am no longer mademoiselle. I am madame. This is technically true because I am now married, but even without the ring my age makes me madame. This affords me a level of respect I did not have when I was 26 and I will take it, thank you very much. I appreciate the culture in a different way than in my youth and find beauty in things like a book market or an old woman with a perfectly knotted scarf. And I don’t take it for granted that old, beautiful places will always be around.
Jusqù’a la prochaine fois (until next time)
Carolyn & Roberto
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I'm so glad I've found your newsletter--I'm enjoying it and taking notes for our early retirement move to France in June. We're not sure where yet, but we know it won't be south nor a big city. But I love that the diesel smell brings back memories for you--I thought I was the only one! Any time I smell it, I'm sent back to Oxford, 1989 when I spent a summer studying Shakespeare's histories there. Good times!
Love reading about all your adventures!